Wednesday, August 3, 2011

The Boy

By now, you must have noticed how much I have mentioned the Boy in my posts as we have been spending so much time together.

While I initially called this whole thing "The Great Dating Experiment", I no longer feel (and have not for a while now) that it is an experiment at all. It did start out as a concerted effort to let someone in, even just a little bit. It was about me trying to trust a man for a change after being hurt so badly a couple of years ago. It was about giving a chance to someone lovely, very interesting, available and who seemed to want to get to know me. And I guess it was also about giving myself a chance to be happy.

But we are past that point. The Boy simply has never let me down, a fact that continues to surprise and amaze me. Of course, we have only been together for three months, it is still very early days and neither of us knows where it's heading but we are enjoying the present. But it feels real.

After 5 years of being "technically" single but tangled up in dysfunctional trysts, I didn't think I was actually capable of being in a normal, straight forward relationship again. With all the good things and not so good things that come with it.

I promise that I will never become a smug "coupled up" person. I have too much life experience to ever take it for granted or expect that it will last forever. I also would never jeopardize the wonderful friendships I have here. My priority is to ensure that I spend as much time as I always have done with my adopted family, the dear friends who are the bedrock of my life, while still nurturing my burgeoning relationship with the Boy. Of course something had to give and so between my friends, the Boy and the gym, I'm afraid the gym had to go! Tough choice but someone had to make it ;-)

Right now I just feel incredibly lucky that I am able to balance everything and get the best of both worlds. To have met someone who likes adventures (cultural, intellectual, physical) as much as I do, someone who is not threatened by my ambition or thirst for life, who does not want to change my life but adds to it, is a wonderful icing on top of what was a pretty tasty cake in the first place!

But (and there is always a "but" in this crazy City) nothing is ever as straight forward as it seems. I remember writing a while ago that everyone here is slightly damaged and it remains a true statement - between his emotional baggage and mine, things are not always easy. But it's worth it. And regardless of what happens, I hope I will never regret trying.

3 comments:

sarahjohansson said...

I am glad to hear you are giving yourself the chance to be happy! Sounds like the two of you might have something real, despite the baggage.

Stephanie said...

Thank you so much Sarah :)

Anonymous said...

I very much approve and share your openness and craving for new experience. What I learned from some previous relationships, guys would never give up their hobbies or arrengements in order to talk or see us more often. So I guess it would be wise to keep and try to combine your friends and the gym and the Boy in your schedule :))